


Say You'll Still Be By My Side

by a-nastywoman (kosm)



Category: American Horror Story, American Horror Story: Hotel
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fix-It of Sorts, Healing, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-31
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:53:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26217442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kosm/pseuds/a-nastywoman
Summary: Maybe this shitty business trip would be the start of something good after all.
Relationships: "Hypodermic" Sally McKenna/Original Character(s), "Hypodermic" Sally McKenna/Reader, "Hypodermic" Sally McKenna/You
Comments: 7
Kudos: 30





	Say You'll Still Be By My Side

It was another dull and rainy weekend in Los Angeles, unfortunately for you, it would be another few weeks before you could go home after your business trip. 

The streets were empty and the rain thundered heavily, sighing you stepped out of the taxi that dropped you off at the Hotel Cortez. The company you worked for had been facing some hard times, usually, you would get 4-star accommodations but this type of run down hotel was becoming the new normal. 

“Thank you,” you muttered to the driver as you left a nice tip and hauled your luggage out from the back seat. Looking up at the Hotel left you with an ominous feeling in your gut as if someone was watching you from one of the many dirty windows facing out to the street. 

Your new leather shoes were soaked in the puddles covering every inch of the street and you sighed in disappointment, they were brand new after all. Shoving the door open and stepping inside, the hotel seemed empty for the most part. 

Only a bald woman stood at the counter dressed far more elegantly than the surrounding interior of the hotel.

“Hi, I have a room for the next 4 weeks under Y/N."

You mustered whatever cheer you could and smiled lightly at the taller woman, it was after all just another day, and the rain bringing you down shouldn’t be taken out on everyone around you. 

“Ah yes, Y/N L/N, I’m Liz, you’re here for the conference being held down the street correct?” The woman spoke silkily and smiled slightly at you in appreciation, you were both wearing Chanel after all. 

“Yes, I’m afraid it won’t be the most exciting business trip I’ve had the pleasure of going on,” you chuckle lightly and looked away, gathering the straps of your luggage tightly in your hands. 

“That’s okay. The Hotel Cortez can keep things plenty exciting, keep an eye out and you might have some fun,” though Liz smiled her words felt more like a warning and you wondered what the next few weeks would bring for you. 

“Thank you, I’ll keep that in mind Liz,” you exhaustedly grabbed your key card from the counter and plodded quickly towards the elevator. Nothing sounded better right now than fresh dry clothes and a clean bed after your 8-hour flight. 

—

After freshening up you decided to leave your suite in the hopes of going out and finding a nice hot dinner, a needed change after your constant week of flying and hotel breakfasts. 

You checked yourself once in the mirror, smoothing out any creases that were left in your work suit before you grabbed your satchel and headed out. 

Stepping into the elevator felt like a huge relief, it almost felt like the walls had eyes in this hotel. It would be just your luck to end up somewhere haunted that made you feel spooked half the time that you were there. 

You finally hit the ground floor and decided to stop by the bar before heading out, maybe you could get a quick shot of vodka to chase down the stress of the day.

As you entered the bar you frowned in concern, there was a woman nestled all alone in a corner booth. Tears streamed down her face as her shaky hands lit up a cigarette, her chest looked like it had open wounds scratched into it. 

The sad woman toyed with the phone in her hand, looking at it desperately like it might hold some answer as to why she was so sad. You couldn’t help yourself as you headed over towards her table, you had been in some bad situations before and only hoped you could help. 

“Hey darling, are you okay?” Her face stuttered upwards at your voice, almost looking as if she couldn’t believe that another person stood before her and willingly talked to her. 

“Well, I’m better now sweetheart. I’m Sally, what’s your name?” A nasty little grin lit up her face but you could still see underneath whatever act she was putting on. You knew the look of a lost woman. 

“Y/N, you sure you’re okay? I’m a little worried about those marks on your chest, someone hurt you?” Sally glanced down at her collarbones like she had no idea what you were talking about. As if she didn’t even feel the pain of whatever open wound was carved into her flesh. 

“Just some bastard, he won’t be back. They never do come back once they take what they want.” The tears started streaming down her cheeks again and you couldn’t understand why someone would hurt and leave a woman this precious behind. 

“Well it sounds like you’ve had some shitty people hanging around, it won’t always be that way though. Some day someone will stick darling.” You put your hand gently on hers, her hands were ice and you felt your concern heighten.

Grabbing her hands in yours you lightly rubbed them between your palms, you were the equivalent of a human heater after all. Always running just a little bit too warm.

Sally didn’t say anything in response, she tugged angrily at her lip and looked down with a pessimistic laugh. It was obvious that she didn’t believe a word you said but you weren’t going to be deterred.

“How about I take you out for some dinner? Get your mind off of the bastard with some good food and even better company.”

Her head shot up and her mouth almost gaped open in astonishment and in that moment your heart truly hurt for her. To think that perhaps she was so unused to a simple kindness that even this small offer of dinner was something shocking.

“I’d love to sugar but I can’t leave,” a bitter smile lit up her face at her words. You could see that something was going on but you didn’t want to push the sad woman too far.

“That’s okay, how about I order us some takeout to the hotel and we go watch a movie hm? That way you aren’t alone right now.” You smiled gently at her as you stood up and tugged her hands along with you.

She tentatively stood from the booth, her leopard print coat sliding off one shoulder messily. Your eyes couldn’t help but linger for just a few seconds on the beautiful cut of her collarbone in the dim lighting.

“You can’t cheer me up with your positive bullshit you know, a movie and food isn’t going to fix it all.”

You smiled at her and winked, “I never said it was going to, I’m not some magician. But misery loves company right? And who doesn’t like a good greasy dinner after some shit head decides to bail.” 

Sally’s tear-stained face lit up with a huge smile and she held tightly to your hand, her fingernails digging in as if she could somehow anchor you to her at this moment so that you would never leave. 

You tossed your arm over her shoulder and pulled the shorter woman into your side while you led her towards the elevator. 

“So what’ll it be?” Plopping your phone into her hands you clicked open an app to order some dinner.

“Get anything that’ll keep that pretty smile on your face.” She looked excited at the prospect, like a person who ate the same thing every day and finally got the luxury of a treat.

You knew in that minuscule second that you wanted to keep that smile on her face as long as you could. 

— 

Sally was curled up against the head of your bed, her head laying gently on your shoulder and her breath steady. A movie played in the background and honestly, you couldn’t even say what it was, so focused on the woman beside you that it barely even registered. 

When you took Sally back to your room you sat her down and patched her up, cleaning up the wounds on her chest, gently putting a bandage over top, and then wiping the tears from her cheeks. 

She had looked at you in wonder, as if she were unused to a gentle touch and kindness from another person. It had made your heart ache to see it. You had your fair share of trauma and you understood better than anyone the feeling of absolute neglect at the hands of others. 

Sally had ordered her food in excitement, you let her pick it all, and practically hauled you on to the bed while you waited. Ranting and raving happily about this show she was watching as you flipped the TV on for her. 

It had been half an hour since then and it seemed as if a calmness had come over both of you. Sally’s tears kept going but she had a tentative little smile on her face so you at least knew that some part of her wasn’t suffering. 

“You want to talk about what happened?” Your voice penetrated the calm silence but you knew that sometimes people just needed permission to be able to let out all of their pain. 

Sally rolled her head up to look at you, the tears speeding up in earnest and a despairing grimace darkening her beautiful features. 

“I saw this guy on and off for a while, thought maybe we had something special. I always begged him to stay with me but he left every time after he got what he wanted.” 

You nodded along, making sure that she knew that you were there and attentive to her words. 

“He was cheating on his wife and doing some bad things on the side, eventually he started hurting me too. Drugs, alcohol, pain, the whole lot.” 

Her hand started shaking lightly as she lit up a cigarette to ease some of the anxiety of speaking. 

“Wasn’t the first time either, people always leave. They never stay, never love me, I just want somebody to love me.” 

You reached out and grabbed her hand, pulling it over into your lap and rubbing your fingers back and forth over her knuckle. Hoping that even just a small touch would remind her that she wasn’t alone tonight. 

“So you had a pretty unhealthy relationship huh? Seems like you were clinging onto somebody who just wasn’t right for you sweetheart.” 

At that Sally broke down into full sobs, you put your arm over her shoulders and pulled her in a little closer. Resting your chin on top of her head, you laid a light kiss on her forehead. 

“If I don’t cling they always go faster, nobody stays when they get what they want but if I keep trying sometimes they keep coming back for just a little longer.” 

Her words were punctuated by tiny sobs, you felt her fists grabbing a handful of your shirt and bunching them between her fingers. 

“I used to do that too and then I got a little help and realized that anybody who doesn’t want to stick around isn’t worth chasing. Sometimes it's easier to live with unhappiness than it is to face what is making you unhappy.” 

Sally sniffled and her nose was a little red at the tip. You couldn’t help but grin at the cuteness of it all, reaching over and passing her some kleenexes you settled into the bed a little more. 

“I don’t deserve help Y/N, all I’ve done is hurt people. I’ve done some really bad things,” a shadow fell over her face when she finished speaking. As if the weight of whatever she had done in the past still felt like bricks on her shoulders. 

“I know you have,” she looked up at you in confusion and you could tell that Sally didn’t understand why you were so unconcerned with her omission of guilt. 

“I could tell from the moment I saw you. People with that kind of darkness in their eyes do dark things to get it. You wouldn’t be the first person to do something bad and you won’t be the last Sally.” 

Sitting up gently, you removed your arm from her shoulders and turned around to face the woman sitting beside you. Resting your head in the palm of your hand you looked at her calmly. 

“People do bad things every day, what matters though is whether you want to stop them or not. Whether you make an effort, even the smallest one.” 

Sally laughed at that and it was not a kind laugh, it was a laugh of derision and disbelief. She shook her head angrily and pulled her knees up to her chest, shielding herself from whatever vulnerability she was no doubt feeling. 

“What does it matter if I make an effort? Nobody is going to forgive me for what I did.” Her hands picked angrily at the dirty lace of her dress, tearing pieces to shreds and throwing them roughly down onto the bed. You watched it happen for a few minutes, allowing her some time to process her anger. 

“Sometimes you can’t get forgiveness but you need to move on without it.” You had done your fair share of bad things in the past, nothing too extreme but enough that you had destroyed a majority of your relationships over time. 

The feeling of wanting forgiveness never went away but in the time you had spent agonizing over it you had learned to forgive yourself in some small way. The most you or Sally could do was hope for the best. 

“How do you do that?” Her eyes flickered around the room, never settling on yours. You could see the tenseness in her frame and the jittery shakes of her hands and knees, a leftover tick from her junkie days. Never settling but always moving. 

“You work on it little by little, maybe get a therapist if you can, try to think about why you did what you did but remove the anger and blame you beat yourself down with.” 

You scooted back over to her on the bed and showed her your phone, since you were on the move so often it was hard to find a physical therapist. Showing her the app on your phone you opened up a virtual therapy session and described how she could book a session and talk with somebody online or over video on her phone.

She held your phone tightly in her hands, a little gasping sob coming out of her. Her eyes met yours and tears continued to fall, she didn’t know what to do for herself. It almost seemed as if she didn’t even know these things were an option.

“Do you forgive me?” Her words were at odds with the conversation the two of you were carrying, her hyper fixation on some sort of forgiveness shining through and breaking the moment. 

“Yes,” you didn’t know what she had done in the past, it was likely something horrible from the level of her guilt.

But despite that, you always tried not to judge. Having worked with reformed inmates, and in therapy settings in the past, you knew that it wasn’t always the best idea to force home the notion of guilt.

Most people tended to respond better when they received praise and encouragement, a little belief, and a positive figure to help guide them along as they processed whatever trauma they had. 

“How could you?” Sally curled in on herself and grasped her hands tightly together, digging her nails into her palms and keening out. You lightly laid your hand on hers, rubbing your thumbs into her knuckles to get her to loosen her grip. 

Bringing them up to your lips you lightly kissed each little dent that she had dug into her palm. You looked up at her frozen face, an expression of absolute adoration lighting her up. 

“If I can so can you, how about we figure it out together?” You pulled her lightly into your side, sliding your arms around her in a warm hug. Her cold arms circled your back as she nuzzled deeply into your neck. You felt the remaining tear tracks smear down your neck but you couldn’t bring yourself to mind. 

“Please,” her word was choked out on a sob and you held her tightly in her arms. Running your hand up and down her back and rocking her in a comforting way.

She cried and cried mumbling pleas over and over into your neck. Her desperation at that moment highlighted just how lonely she felt and how much all the rejection she had faced over the years had hurt her. 

It reminded you distinctly of yourself a few years ago, young and scared. Just escaping another abusive relationship and with nobody to go to you struggled to survive.

At that moment where you rocked Sally in your arms, you hoped that perhaps you could make a difference for her and be the person that you never really had in your life.

So often you were reminded of how hard it was to survive on your own, isolated from everybody else around you. It seemed as if Sally was in a similar situation, unable to leave the hotel and jumping from a toxic relationship to a toxic relationship.

You felt her lips kiss gently against your neck and resisted shivering in pleasure at the feeling. It was hard to deny how attracted you were to Sally but you didn’t want to start anything with her when she was so vulnerable.

Perhaps maybe in time, she would be in a place where it would be okay to pursue something but you could already feel a little bit of love spark in your chest for the messy woman. 

You couldn’t help the grin that rose on your lips, pressing your mouth into her frizzy hair to hide it from sight. Exhaling a little breath you couldn’t help but think that maybe this shitty business trip would be the start of something good after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know if you want more, I'm thinking of making this a series!
> 
> Find me on Tumblr @a-nastywoman


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